“My Father Will Kill Me” … Part 4 (Conclusion)

Raising a child is not the responsibility of just one parent. Whenever you can help it, share chores with your partner. You may be capable of managing everything on your own perfectly or your husband may actually keep very busy as my surgeon husband does, but remember it is important for the child to see that both his parents are involved in raising him. From there will grow respect for both parents and the distance we know as fear for anyone parent, will dissipate. Distance and lack of communication breed fear and as I said Fear is NOT Respect. It is also important that the child sees his parents loving and respecting each other. As they say “the best gift a man can give to his child is to love his mother”. I am sure the vice-versa holds true as well. Let your home be your and your child’s den of peace and bliss.

Today a child is constantly performing and I don’t just mean performance in a TERM EXAM. I mean the child is constantly under the pressure of performing some or the other role-student, dancer, pianist, young chef, athlete, karate champ, artist, disciplined child and so on. When is he really himself?

As a parent, it is your duty to give him the recreation and time to be himself. Every day gives him half an hour on weekdays and one hour on weekends to just being himself – let him scream, cry, shout around, just sit in a corner and daydream, laugh aloud, read a book or utter absolute gibberish in front of you. Just let go for that half hour/hour. The only condition- you have to patiently be beside him that half/one hour. In fact, you could both indulge in the monkeying around just so your child knows that Mommy loves him/her even when he/she is not performing. When a child feels valued for WHAT HE IS, he learns to hold his head high in every adversity from a very tender age itself.

Finally, dedicate 30 minutes in the whole day to the “ME” in the “MOM –MEE”. It may be a cup of tea in the morning, a round of exercise, a jog in the evening, a book you like to curl up with or anything else you fancy but remember to give yourself this ritual because you deserve it. Charge yourself up with this 30 minute “Me-time” (at least 30 minutes) and see yourself cutting out half the stress from Mommyness.

Remember, FEAR PSYCHOSIS works as a deterrent for criminals –that’s largely true.
But we are raising children not criminals. Let the fear disappear. Let respect, honesty and discipline be the “WHAT” we want our children to imbibe. Let love, patience, empathy and friendship be the “HOW” we apply to enable them to acquire those.

With love to every Mommy out there…..
Until next time…………Stay Mommylicious !!!

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